Poet

🍷 Now Hiring: Poet 📖

Location: A dimly lit corner of your favorite dive bar
Compensation: Pay? Nah. But you’ll be rich in angst and applause.
Hours: Whenever inspiration strikes… or the whiskey does first.

We’re seeking a soul-stirred, wine-soaked wordsmith to howl at the moon and scrawl truth across napkins, bar receipts, and maybe the occasional bathroom stall. Must be fluent in heartbreak, fluent in jazz, and preferably incoherent before noon.

Requirements:

• Ability to rant beautifully about love, death, and diner coffee

• Must own at least one typewriter (working or not)

• Comfortable performing poetry to audiences who may or may not be listening

• Strong opinions on Kerouac, Bukowski, or both

• Willingness to be paid in drink tickets and existential dread

Bonus points for:

• Chain-smoking without setting your journal on fire

• Knowing what “beatific disillusionment” means (or sounding like you do)

• Having a signature hat or unkempt aesthetic

Think you’ve got the guts, the gut, and the gut-spilling verse? Send us a sample poem, a blurry photo, or just show up and start reciting under the jukebox.